Avoiding holiday havoc for autistic children
“School’s out for summer” sang Alice Cooper in 1972, four words that strike fear in many parents’ ears! How are we going to keep our children occupied and entertained for six whole weeks? How will we survive? If this rings true for you, spare a thought for the parents of many autistic children, for whom this can be an even more stressful experience.
In the UK we are only a couple of weeks away from that period in which many parents of autistic children most dread-the six week summer school break! This is a time when schedule and routine are thrown to the wind, to be replaced with an over-abundance of choice and uncertainty. And I’m not just talking about the British weather!
For some autistic children, including myself, when I was younger, the school environment can be an unforgiving and threatening place . However, despite its many horrors, school life does provide some routine and structure, even if that is not autism-specific, and rarely person-centred.
Many neurotypical children approach the summer holidays with excitement and anticipation around all the fun things they can get up to away from the rigid monotony of school. For these children, the school holidays are an escapist and joy-filled time, with weeks of lie ins, seeing friends and visiting new places. Whilst some parents might be worried about how on Earth they are going to entertain their little ones for a mammoth six weeks, few will miss the stress of the school run or the fight to encourage their “little darlings” to get out of bed, and get themselves and their offspring ready every morning.
However, for autistic children and their parents, the approach of the school holidays can be met with real dread and extreme anxiety .
Most autistic children benefit greatly from routine and structure in their day. The uncertainty and anxiety around what is going to happen next, who they are going to see and what time they will be performing activities can be greatly reduced by the rigid structure of the school day despite the many sensory and social difficulties that the environment places upon them . Most weeks lesson times, lunch times and play times rarely differ day to day, or lesson schedules week to week. This expectant certainty helps make school more tolerable than the uncertainty of term breaks and holidays.
The 6 week break can feel, for some, too massive a change in routine, unless handled sensitively by autism-specific individual strategic planning.
However it needn’t all be doom and gloom ! There are many things that can be done to help autistic children (and their parents or carers) to cope with the transition from school to summer break and assist them to have a less stressful time during the 6 week school hiatus.
The word autism obviously begins with the letters “A” and “U.” Each child is “Always Unique. ” Autistic individuals are not all like “Rainman,” Sheldon Cooper (from the Big Bang Theory) or a cross between Mr Bean and Mr Spock ! Every autistic child is different. Consequently , what might work brilliantly for one child may be disastrous for another.
Therefore, before embarking on any strategies to survive the school holidays, a person centred approach, looking at understanding each autistic child’s unique needs, sensitivities, strengths, likes and dislikes, must always be the starting point .
However, for many autistic children, some of these following tips could be useful starting points :
Keep a visual holiday calendar or timetable
By sitting down with an autistic child and planning for the week ahead together, the parent can help ensure that the child knows what is coming up for them and prepare them for any planned changes , through a structured schedule that may reduce anxiety around changes of routine .
Turning this into a visual timetable for each week can be a really useful tool for the child to use on their own to remind them of their schedule that day or on a particular week. It is essential however, that alternative plans are also included on any schedule to allow for predictable changes such as inclement weather (especially in the UK)!
For example; if you know that every Tuesday of the break Granny Smith will be providing childcare while you are at work, this could be scheduled in every week, with a picture of Granny, what time she will be picking the child up and dropping him/her off, and what activities they will be doing together that week.
Use the internet to show them places you will be visiting
The internet can be a very useful tool. It can be used to source places of interest, working out travelling times and planned stops en route ( if needed), some photos of destination, and to pre-pay tickets and enquire about autism/disability provision such as passes to avoid queuing. All of these measures can help to reduce anxiety. Most websites will also offer pictures of the various facilities and activities that are available, and this can help make it seem much more familiar when they arrive and thereby reduce their anxiety.
I will be looking at planning summer holiday vacations in future posts for both parents and carers and for autistic adults too . Watch this space !
Use alarms, timers or “traffic lights” to aid with transition
Many autistic children struggle with concept of time or transitioning from one activity to another. If your child struggles with this, it can be really useful to use an alarm or timer to help them know when it is time to finish an activity. For some children a simple 5 or 10 minute warning using outstretched palms showing either 5 or 10 fingers may be sufficient, as a visual countdown . This “pre-warning” provides processing time for an autistic child to prepare for a transition to another room, venue or activity. Most children will soon learn to respond to these simple prompts and react accordingly.
Use social stories
Social stories (TM) were developed by Carol Gray as “ways to help people with autism develop greater social understanding.” They are short descriptions of a particular event or activity, split into a series of no more than about 1/2 dozen sentences, which include specific information about what might happen and an appropriate social response. You could make one yourself about a particular event or situation that is coming up, or find one online, and they should aim to offer positive and clear reassurance about a situation in a way accessible to the age of your child. Social stories (TM) can also be used to help your child to manage their own anxieties and “challenging behaviour.”
Again , I will be covering this in a future post. For further information on writing social stories (TM), feel free to leave a comment below or check out Carols’ website : https://carolgraysocialstories.com
Try to maintain one routine event every day
Whilst a strict routine may not be entirely desirable, or indeed practical, for either parent or child during the long summer break, it can be quite beneficial to try to keep at least one thing routine every day, if that is at all possible. For example; this could be evening mealtime or bedtime routine. This can help prepare your child for the next day and help to take stock on the current day.
Be aware of sensory needs
Schools aren’t the only crowded or noisy sensory environments ! Summer with literally millions of children and their parents away from school or work, makes any summer activity more likely to be a sensory nightmare for your autistic child.
On a hot summer day in July and August, coastal destinations can be particularly crowded and noisy places . Whilst the beach, swimming pools and other seaside attractions can be great fun for most people, these can be a sensory nightmare! Crowds, hot sand or rocky beaches, blistering sun (or torrential downpours !) sun cream and the sights ands sounds of the amusement arcades or fun fairs can all contribute to a huge assault on the senses of an autistic child.
For example, beach sand or pebbly beaches can be extremely unsettling for an autistic child, especially if they are not used to having bare feet. A good tip here could be to try water shoes or “crocs” instead, which protect the child’s feet from direct contact with the sand. Similarly, the sensation of thick, cold, sun cream, along with having skin touched , can present a sensory issue. A spray sun cream, applied by the child himself/herself may be a preferred option.
Once again, every child is different, so sensory needs will be very specific to each individual.
Finally -RELAX!
At the end of the day, all that any parent can do for their child is try to do their best . You are no exception!
Surviving the summer holidays for both parent and autistic child will inevitably involve some trial and error. There will be some challenging behaviours at times , from both child and parent .As the late American folk country singer, John Denver, wrote “some days are diamonds, some days are stone.”
Hopefully, some of the tips here, and those later to come (about summer vacations), could be useful in helping you and your autistic child thrive, or at the very least, survive, the school holidays.
Life has a way of throwing a spanner in the works , or as Americans may call it “a curve ball,” and however well you plan or schedule “ the best laid plans of mice and men” may go awry .
Be kind to yourself, you are doing great! Every parent views the summer break from school with a combination of hope and dread. Parents of autistic children may face extra hurdles, but many other parents face similar hurdles to in order to keep little Jimmy happy and occupied for 6 long weeks.
No amount of planning, preparation, and scheduling can prepare you for every eventuality.
All you can do, and all any one can do , is try your best and hope it will all work out okay.
So relax, believe in yourself and enjoy the summer!
References
https://www.autism.org.uk/about/strategies/social-stories-comic-strips.aspx
http://www.autismnetworkscotland.org.uk/summer-holiday-hints-and-tips-for-parents/
https://www.ambitiousaboutautism.org.uk/understanding-autism/understanding-autism-out-and-about/autism-summer-holidays-with-autism
